Take the Risk

Hello,

How do you figure out your aim? 

For a few, it may be a straightforward question, for others,

not so much.

I think I figured it out in 2020, or at least that is what I believe. Aims are just as delicate as your night dreams, it just takes one moment to snap out of it completely- a situation or a distraction. As a teenager, I try my level hard to not have the latter because the former is not under my control. I fear a lot of things in my life and one of them is if I don't accomplish my plans.

We all have it in us, that 'what if I am not enough?', 'what if things take a wrong turn?', 'what if I don't manage my life?'. And they are the best and worst parts of our lives. Worse because it makes us have self-doubts, jealousy, and trust issues; best because it lets you take risks and push your limits. And not taking risks is the biggest risk you can take in your life. 

Having an aim gives you purpose in life. Once you get the right motivation, you automatically start prioritizing it. And that is what I call maturity. The day you know what is right for you, and the people who are affected by your decisions is the time you attain your maturity, fully and finally. 

I have grown up listening to the struggles of my grandfather. Although I spent little time of my life with him, it was enough to make me realise how good of a man he was. He was everything a man should be. His hard work is the reason my father did good in his life and proved himself and they both are the reason I wish to prove myself. I saw a lot of self-made persons in my life. All of them had their journeys. Some started after graduation, some were focused since 1st grade of school and some got in their senses after their 10th standard result. All of them were different in personalities but all of them did one thing in common, they accepted themselves, whether good or bad.

Qualities like discipline, hard work, dedication and determination did play an enormous amount of role but it all started at the very same thing. If they were good students they polished themselves and if they were bad they worked hard to be the best. I can not imagine someone doing something if they don't have faith in themself. You have to accept the realities, you cannot spend your whole life thinking that others are more privileged or they have better than you.

Welcome your uniqueness and personality with open arms. How would you work on yourself if you don't accept it? I know it is difficult to face the bad side. To face the criticism. But you eventually have to do it, there is no escape.

People will say. It is just their insecurities that they put to display when they drag you down. To satisfy their ego then want others to be worse than them. Don't let others' half-accomplished aims, frustration and negativity affect you. You will harm yourself more than they can ever do. 

The battle is never with the outside world, it is always your mind. As much as I love to admit the potential of the human brain, and the emotions it makes us feel, I certainly hate the negativity it can bring to one's life. 

All of us stress about things that don't even matter. We all know that the opinions of the classmate sitting in the 3rd row, 2nd last bench won't matter in the long run, yet we overthink about it. We know the misogynistic jokes won't matter, yet we let them consume us. The lectures we get about our body from parents, the comments we get about our results from relatives and the constant threats from teachers in school will NOT MATTER, yet all we find ourselves every single time is in the same damn loop. The I-Am-Not-Enough loop. The I-Am-Not-Strong loop. The I-Am-Not-Confident loop. 

I don't know if there is any solution to all the problems I mentioned above but I sincerely try alternatives. If I cannot let the bad thoughts go away, I try to bring the good thoughts in. I give more space and time to good memories and confident moments. 

We all have those moments, where we feel strong, sensible and smart. Why don't we think about them as often as we think about the opposites? Why don't we try feeling good about what we have, for once? Firsts are always hard, the day you give space to the good things. your brain will crave it the next time. So, take the risk to work on yourself for your betterment, take the risk to help yourself. And maybe one day, just one fine day you can get out of that loop.

I am no therapist, nor do I have enough experience in life. Whatever I have learnt is either a mixture of qualities of people I look up to or simply hit and trial. The alternatives that work for me may not be for you but you have to figure it out. You can never run from facing your mind. You have to do it sooner or later because regrets are way more painful than confronting your thoughts.

I'll catch you in the next one,

Diana Jean.